Making the Decision

I first found Effie while searching through waiting children photo listings. History shows that I start looking about every 3 - 4 years.... This time I was ONLY LOOKING! I had no intention of adopting again. I was about to turn 45! Not that 45 is old or anything but I am eligible to retire in 6 years. My youngest is 9 which means he'll graduate high school just a few short years later....Hmmm.

Effie was probably about 10 months old in the photo.  As I mentioned in my previous post, I soon found a video of her posted on another site and she appeared to be about 2 1/2 years old. I knew I was falling in love but did I have the energy (not to mention the finances) to do it all over again?

I began researching her condition which I soon figured out was not her diagnosis. In addition to her nose malformation, I learned she had a Tessier Facial Cleft. I watched her video again and again and again. I emailed the craniofacial surgeon who had repaired my son's cleft palate and asked his prognosis.

I couldn't get her out of my mind. I struggled for weeks, questioned my self, talked to my kids about it, struggled some more. I was consumed for a period of time with indecisiveness. Besides, I wasn't even eligible. Since I'm single, the guidelines from China stipulate that in order for me to adopt, I can't have more than 2 children under the age of 18 in the home. But sometimes an exception could be made...

I submitted the application to the adoption agency and about three weeks later I received the Notice from the China Centre for Children's Welfare and Adoption that I was preliminarily approved to adopt Effie. With that approval, I got another picture. She's probably about 18 months and looks a little sad at the moment.

The struggle, the indecisiveness, the doubt...all gone. Effie is going to be my daughter and I am elated!